I think me and Nienie are the only ones blogging now-a-days.  Well...  Leslie Woolf too... she's my go-to blog for checking up on everyone in Mesa that I love, and for getting weekly inspiration (she's awesomely organized, and spiritual, insightful, and kind ) :)  thanks Leslie for always blogging too!
Other than that my family and friends are not updating their blogs!!!!  oh well... :)  I will be seeing them soon so what's the big deal huh?

Today was a good day.
Church yesterday was good.
The day started badly.  (Sunday that is)  Sundays usually do.  I figure it's just the devil trying to keep me from going to church to think about God and my Savior.... keep me from putting a few drops into my often empty cup.
I don't think I was even out of bed before I was irrationally furious.  My poor husband.

Well.. we got to church and I felt awkward.  That rage inside me and the spirit and calm that is in the chapel simply do not mesh.  So I eventually gave up my rage and anger... repented in my head to my God...  and I asked him for help.

Boy do I need help.

You know what...?

That help came.
Today.


:)   (huge grin)


I could not wake up this morning.  I think I drifted in and out of sleep for I don't know how long while the baby screamed on the bed next to me and Kai screamed in his crib (he was on time out for wacking one of the girls).  I never do that!!  But I swear... it took me until 11:30 to fully get my brain and body up and functional.  I had fed the baby a million times, and she cried and barfed a million times... and the mess that the girls had made while I was partially comatose for just horrendous ...  messes were everywhere.  It was super gross.

I was embarrassed, but also a little relieved when my friend Carrie stopped by noon.  She is in the Relief Society presidency, and the only on in town right now.  She came to see if I needed anything.  Without asking she came in and gave the girls loves and then got them to clean up everything... well... SHE cleaned up everything... my front room and the girls room.  It was an all out disaster and in a matter of a few minutes, she had it looking beautiful again.  She even let me take a shower, which was a relief.  I washed me, Kai and the baby... and we all needed it badly!!  Carrie also set up for the girls to go play with another friend from the ward, Richelle.  While they were gone being entertained, I got Kai and the baby and myself down for a nap.  Seriously it was from 1 to 4.  and it was pure BLISS!!!!
Soon after the girls came home and it got wild again.  Kai was in a rotten mood all afternoon and evening... and I fed the baby a million more times and she either cried or nursed from 4 until 10 tonight...  That stubborn little butt - she watches me... and if I get too far away she cries.  If I don't hold her just how she likes, she cries.  If her diaper is a little wet she cries.  SHEESH!!

But anyway...   it was a good day.  I even went running tonight.  It was harder running tonight that it was the first time I went running since I had the baby...  man I have gotten fat - it is no bueno.  My own girls tell me I'm fat - that's always fun, ha ha!  it's so sad cause they are so honest so I know its got to be true.  I'm really really trying to find the physical motivation to do what I so desperately want to do - go out and get active and exercise - but my body and mind are so exhausted all the time.  Well - I just need to dig a little deeper and do it and stop making excuses...  I'll have to update on that to keep myself in check.  I also need to do it for the girls.  I think they have gained weight with me.  Keira has gotten a little chubby in the past couple months and Jayden is starting to fill out a little bit too... But I think they are just kids getting ready for growth spurts..  What do you think about it?  How worried do I need to be about their weight?  They are 4 1/2 and 5 1/2...?  I don't want to make a big deal.  I would never want my girls to ever feel bad about themselves... and they are so young I don't think they even need to know anything about it...  but they know what fat is, and they say "chubby"...  and we try and talk about what being healthy is...  maybe I'll do a lesson this week on the word of wisdom and talk more about it...  hmmm..?

anyway...  I better wind down now and get myself to bed.. It's almost midnight... I guess blogging is part of my winding down...  it feels good.

Basically I just needed to say I'm grateful for today.  The good and the bad.. but it was mostly good :)
I'm grateful Heavenly Father heard my prayer yesterday and so promptly answered today!!!  It was probably more for the benefit of all these little kids I got than for me - God was probably worried about them and sent help!!

So thank you Carrie!!  and Thank you Richelle and Cole!!
It is such a blessing to receive help from wonderful people like them.

Tomorrow I get to help someone else...  :)  I'm babysitting for someone while they go through the temple and take out their endowments...  I'm very excited for her and excited to help someone.  I hope I can do a good job!  :)

well...goodnight.... and if you're Brynn or Rebecca or Bethany...  blog so I can see what you're up to!!!